Positively to the point

Maia: “L” is not nice. He makes me crazy. He always says, “I’m positive, I’m positive.” But he’s not positive. I’M positive. I’m positive he’s a bad boy.

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Choose one

What a way to wake up. Maia comes into my room and asks,

“Hey Papa, if you had to choose one food to eat everyday for the rest of your life, what would it be?”
“Hmm. I don’t know. Maybe broccoli … or spinach.”
“NO! You can only choose one.”
“I see. Okay. Spinach.”
“Really? I would choose candy. And ice cream. And …”
“Hey! I thought it was only one!”
“I changed my mind. And grapes. And watermelon. And …”

I know you are but what am I?

Maia: “Papa, you’re a poopy pants.”
Me: “I know you are but what am I?”
Maia: “You’re a stinky pie.”
Me: “I know you are but what am I?”
Maia: “You’re beautiful.”
Me: “I know I am but what are you?”
Maia: “Hey! You can’t say that!”
Me: “Okay, my turn. Hey Maia, you’re a poopy pants.”
Maia: “I know you are but what am I?”
Me: “You’re a stinky pie.”
Maia: “I know you are but what am I?”
Me: “You’re a handsome boy.”
Maia: “I know … … … … HEY! That’s not FAIR!!!”